I get a lot of spam. Lately I've been getting 3 or 4 spam emails a day offering to help me become the man I've apparently always wanted to be. It's kind of starting to bother me.
I've always been a tomboy. I have always preferred climbing trees, smoking cigarettes and drinking beer to putting on make up, wearing pink or got forbid, a skirt. Lately I've been trying to change some of that. I'm nearing 40 so I'm shying away from the tree climbing. However, I'm embracing the cigarette smoking and drinking beer more.....while wearing make up, pink, and skirts. (It's as confusing for me as it is for you - sometimes it even involves nail polish.)
So, this influx of spam asking me if I want to become the man I've always wanted to be has me in a bit of a quandary. How does the Internet know I'm a tomboy? And do they really think that makes me want to be a man? I like being a girl that can drink her husband under the table AND kick his ass in soccer. I don't want a penis. It'll just ruin everything. Do I write them back and tell them to email people I hate instead of me? Do I acquire a deep-seated self-hatred and begin to question my sexuality? What do I do?
Damn spam. Life used to be so simple.
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2 comments:
I think that spam was meant for me. So you can just forward that over when you get the chance.
Ann Coulter says she's more of a man than any liberal male of the species. I'm not sure why that's relevant.
Embrace the pink. Pink is fun when you're old and established enough that you don't have to be one of the boys. Chicks rule. Tee hee hee.
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