As I sit here waiting for PWTS and his lovely wife to arrive for their weekend visit, I had the urge to write a post. This has become a little intimidating lately as DMC has pointed out, neither of us are particularly good writers and we seem to have lost all sense of what is funny.
Case in point: After an extremely stressful couple of weeks due to killer finals, a major software upgrade that I stupidly scheduled for the week of my killer finals, AND travel over Hell's Half-Acre to visit every person even remotely related to us over the holidays, we decided to rent some crap movies. We're usually pretty good at picking crap.
Our criteria was that the movies couldn't be thought-provoking, stressful or depressing in any way. We made the following selections: Beerfest, Scary Movie 4, Ultraviolet, and Clerks 2. It was quite possibly the most embarrassing Blockbuster checkout we've ever made (you know those clerks are passing judgement on your selections).
Let me be clear: I know my crap and I enjoy crap. I own GoodBurger (best homoerotic thriller EVER) on DVD for Christ's sake. But, these movies really sucked. Granted, I laughed a good bit through Beerfest and Ultraviolet had Mila Jovovich (who is totally hot and on my "Gay List") but, these were beyond our limits.
At first I thought it was the movies but then DMC pointed out that we are no longer the witty, pop-culture enthusiasts we once were. So, the problem was not the movies. It was US. How terrifying. I was feeling really good about 2006 - I actually kept all of my New Year's Resolutions (lose weight, start school and quit smoking - although I did start smoking again during Hell Week). I was thinking this was the best year ever and then discovered, through some shitty movies that somehow over the course of the year I became an old, boring, worthless human being.
Happy Fucking New Year.
2 comments:
As my lovely wife and I were driving to Mavis's, we talked about how the early 90's seem like yesterday. That must have been when we stopped progressing, or at least opted out of the lemming march to the sea. I mean Jesus Christ, I still listen to cassette tapes, which means I'll have to find head cleaner somewhere.
I used to have a theory that people stopped listening to new music at age 30, and considering how music-focused youth culture is, that would mean ossification. The last new artists I listened to were PJ Harvey and Rage Against the Machine, so you know how old I am. My wife still listens to new music, though, so she remains eternally young in heart and appearance.
I do have to brag some on my generation, though--could any movie possibly be as bad/worthless as Porky's? I didn't think so. Oh, and I saw both it and Porky's II in the theater. (Odd fact: The director of Porky's also directed A Christmas Story.)
Maybe we're just developing taste, Mavis? I'm sure if a good movie happened along (say Ricky Bobby, for instance) we'd like it, but 90% of Hollywood has always been crap but we think differently because only the good movies get replayed and remembered.
Applause on your resolve, Mavis, although I'm happy for your relapse. I love secondhand smoke and am going through withdrawal right now. I once resolved to be a better person. That failed miserably.
Hey, guys! Hope everyone is well. I've lost e-mail addresses so just wanted to say "hi". MIke and I are doing well, the holidays were intense with Dayton visits and Cleveland visits and Christine is talking up a storm and potty-trained. She's very tall and has tons of hair! School is good...France this summer with my students was awesome. Mike and I miss everyone a whole bunch and this we should do something soon!
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